Does someone love you in they cheat on you? A person can love you wholeheartedly and still cheat on you. Love doesn’t determine or doesn’t stop a man from committing infidelity. When a man loves and respects you. It becomes hard for him to cheat on you. So when building love in a relationship you also earn your respect. Your spouse should respect your feelings and emotions. He should be able to tell what would make you unhappy or what would hurt you.
When he respects you, he will avoid cheating on you. Cheating on one’s partner might not necessarily mean they do not love or appreciate you, it means that they felt something at that trying period that they haven’t felt for a period of time and they were longing to have that feeling once again. Your partner would be genuinely sorry and repentant and still love you completely but that doesn’t guarantee that they won’t cheat.
Most people would often ask the question. Does my spouse really love me? If he loves me, why did he cheat on me? Was our love not enough to stop him? Didn’t he think about me before cheating? What led him to do it?
You certainly have one thousand and one questions going on in your mind but the truth is. At the beginning of every relationship joy, peace, love, understanding, etc comes naturally. But then as the relationship graduates to various stages, the excitement you once felt is no longer there. You find yourself asking what really went wrong. You feel there is a part of the relationship that has gone missing and all that.
The point is after passing the initial stage, you and your spouse need to start making yourself happy. Be responsible for keeping and activating the love you have for one another. Help yourselves to earn the individual’s respect. The kind of true love that is often portrayed in movies is actually different from the love that happens in reality.
When you buy a pet, that is really chubby and appealing to the sight and you just look at it often without taking care of it or feeding it. Such a pet would grow lean and look unkempt. The same applies to when you are planting and you do not water the plant during the dry season it would certainly wither. So also in relationships, you have to water, feed and nurture to make it last. And yes your partner can still be crazy about you and cheat on you.
Can Someone Who Cheated On You Still Love You?
Yes. He might still love you and still want you in his life. Such a mistake might be a result of some total confusion. Probably he felt you were the one or he sees you in the person. Your partner might love you and still cheat on you when you deprive him of what is rightfully his, you can’t starve him for so long and expect him not to accept someone who has been constantly offering him that same food you have starved him with.
Yes he loves you and due to that love, he must have rejected you several times but he would definitely succumb sooner or later. Meanwhile, he might no longer love you and that might be the reason he cheated. Whichever way you have to hear from him. And try to think calmly and understand if he truly still loves you or if he just doesn’t want the relationship to fall apart.
Why Would He Cheat On You If He Loves You?
Having answered the above questions you might want to know why he would cheat on you despite the fact that he loves you. Like I said earlier, Love alone can not stop your spouse from cheating on you. Love is not enough reason. Now let’s look at the possible reasons he cheated on you.
- Lack Of Self Care
- Lack Of Communication
Lack Of Self Care
You feel you are finally married and you do not need to dress the way you do. Or put on your favorite lipsticks because you are now a married woman. Dressing up, as usual, becomes a joke because you decide to put on clothes that are too shabby. Or you do not find bathing or dressing up as something of importance.
Now you need to ask yourself these questions, would your partner have ever asked you out if you had dressed shabbily at the initial stage? Of course, the answer is NO. As you grow in your relationship you have to awaken the appetite of your man to always want you. He shouldn’t think of any other person besides you. If you are packaging and taking care of yourself as you should I doubt he would even look at another woman?
Lack Of Communication
You might be in the same bedroom and the same house but he feels completely distanced from you. Why, probably because all you want to talk about is what you learned from Mr. O or Mrs. Q. Have you ever had time to ask him how his day went? Or what his plans are? Try having the kind of conversations you had then. Don’t feel it’s not necessary because you are married or you are in an advanced relationship. If you don’t give him attention and communicate with him properly there are a lot of women out there who would do anything to make sure they start a conversation with him.
There is this couple I know whose way of communication is actually amazing even after several years. They chat like they are still dating, They call themselves even though they are still in the same house. They leave notes in their rooms, lunch boxes, cars, and so on for one another and when it gets to the time of talking to one another it feels like they are actually new lovers. Try improving your communication.
How Do I Know He Loves Me After He Cheated?
A man who loves you would do absolutely everything to seek your forgiveness, once he realizes what he has done. He would be remorseful like everyone who has offended and are genuinely sorry. He won’t repeat his mistakes.
He would try to talk to you about what made him do it. He would take responsibility, apologize continually, and accept whatever punishment you might want to offer. He would stand by you and offer his help even when you refuse to accept his help. A man who loves you will not blame you for his misdeeds, rather he would work on improving your relationship.
What To Do When He Cheats
It is not easy to put up with one’s partner especially when he cheated on you. Most marriages and relationships end due to infidelity, but if he happens to still love you then you should try to make your marriage or relationship work.
- Take Your Time
- Plan Together
- Start Afresh
Take Your Time
He has cheated and he is sorry about what he has done. But the wound is still fresh and you need some time off. Take time off yourself for a while if you are married and you share a room, try moving to the guest room.
You can talk to yourself but certainly not about the issue until you are fully ready to move on. If you aren’t married, leave the house and take some time alone to get it off your head. Allow time to work. It’s wonderful.
Sit together and plan for the future. Get him to write about the things he likes and doesn’t like about you. And you should also do the same. It would help you see your strengths and your weaknesses and help you build them to avoid such a situation in the future.
Plan on things you would do going forward and improve on those things you don’t do earlier on. Ask questions about what attracted him, no matter how painful you might feel hearing about another lady, you have got to listen to it if it would help you improve your relationship or make your marriage work. Am not asking you to change yourself and saying change your mind about marriage and relationships.
Start afresh, go on dates, and talk to yourselves like you are new lovers who just started dating recently. Do things together and do not give room for space or void in your marriage or relationship.
There is no perfect marriage or relationship out there as everyone has their individual flaws and is trying to hide them. So do not compare your marriage or relationship to that on social media.
You do not leave with them, you do not know what they have to pass through every day or what they have been through. So try staying through to yourself. It is okay to forgive if your partner cheated once and he is ready to change his ways. Give him the chance to correct his mistakes. Try to seek help and advice from marriage counselors. Go for tests in case of STDs.
– Ilufoye Ibukun